I couldn’t figure out why I felt off on my walk in the woods this morning. I even passed my favorite tree without noticing.
Then I checked on what my mind was doing. It was ruminating about a mistake my daughter might make in her ongoing legal battle with her ex and what I’d say to her about it.
But I didn’t escalate to becoming anxious. After 10 minutes of reciting the words I memorized and looking up at the trees (not down at the ground), I felt like myself again.
Checking on your mind is a game-changer, Reader.
Because overthinking starts with one thought that triggers others. If you catch these early thoughts, you can avoid the full-blown experience of rumination that feels so terrible in head and body.
But noticing what you’re thinking doesn’t come naturally. So try this to build the habit:
Stop what you’re doing 4 times a day and recall what you were thinking about for the last minute. Set an alarm to help you remember.
You can power-charge this by jotting down what you were thinking about. After a week or so, look back and see where your mind spends the most time.
You also need to know what to check for. In general, you’re seeing if your thoughts are helping you or getting in your way. Helpful thoughts feel like you’re making progress.
But thoughts that get in your way feel like you're stuck in mud. They’re usually related to one of these 5 things:
- Trying to make a decision
- How much you suck and why
- Something that happened in the past or is likely to happen
- What someone else is thinking
- Catastrophes that might occur
If you’d like more details, read this post. My thoughts about my daughter combined a possible disaster (#5) and a conversation I thought would happen (#3).
Help your mind work for you. Not against you.
All my best,
Jenni
PS. Managing the noise in your head is one foundation of creating healthy relationships.
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